2020 Labels That Rock
2020 has been quite a year and that’s no exception for clothing labels. Now that the year draws to a close we would like to present our expert opinion on the top 10 clothing labels out there this year!
It’s not large, it’s not small...it’s the goldilocks sizelabel that says “Just Right.” Whether attached to a t-shirt, soft pants, or even a hat, our friend M has our back with a right-in-the-middle message.
9. 100% Cotton
When is anything in life ever 100%? How about when it’s cotton?
This historically fraught and now ubiquitous plant-based material is one of the most dependable fibers out there. It’s smooth, soft and highly desirable for its skin-friendly texture the world over.
It's not always a party with cotton though. Make sure you keep reading the other labels on 100% cotton care labels as they come with a catch.
Which takes us to number 8.
8. Some Shrinkage May Occur
Sometimes things can get too hot for cotton and other heat-sensitive fabrics requiring a stern warning. It's kind of a big deal that what you put in the dryer might not be the same size after you take it out.
Take heed loyal readers and buy a size larger than usual if you plan on dumping your laundry basket into the wash and letting god sort it out.
7. Dry Clean Only
This is like if you had to apply the rule of batteries to your clothes - Don’t get them wet!
Instead, clean them with the mysterious “dry” method that can only be done in the back rooms of magical cleaning establishments. Nobody is really sure what happens to your clothes at the dry cleaner and frankly we don’t want to know.
We just know that this label is off the hook when it comes to making sure that (usually expensive) something stays just like when you bought it by avoiding “wet” cleaning - which for many of use we refer to as "cleaning."
Is this a poor attempt at writing 90 in roman numerals? No! It’s a big-and-tall size that features two Xs in a row. It’s Extra Extra!
Outside of Newsie speak where else do you commonly use the same modifier twice in a row? It’s like an official designation of size along the lines of “it’s not just red, it’s really really red.”
Also if you buy a 100% cotton t-shirt and wear a size XL you might want to buy a XXL instead as some shrinkage may occur - or so we’ve been told.
5. One Size Fits All
Welcome to Utopia. Everything here is amazing. Can we help you to your complimentary bungalow?
There’s unlimited free beer, packages never go missing off of your front porch, and one size fits all.
Just bask in it for a moment.
4. Inspected by #6
This label asks more questions than it answers.
Who is #6?
Is it good that these pants were inspected? What did #6 inspect exactly?
Who does #6 work for and do they know #2?
This label is extraordinary and kind of scary so we made the #6 inspection #4.
3. Tumble Dry Low
This label tells a story. It’s like if Hemmingway got a job writing labels. There’s action, exposition and a warning - all in three words.
Also “Tumble” is just a fun verb that in most other contexts requires a trip to the hospital.
2. Size 8
It’s just such a classic number. 8 is great. We use the number all the time over here and frankly find it to be luckier than its closest relative, the number 7.
9 is pretty cool too but odd number size labels are just that - odd.
We salute you #8 and look forward to seeing you anywhere you are applicable.
1. This tag may not be removed under penalty of law except by the consumer
Labels have gotten so powerful that they now have lawyers, and given the tone of the warning, they ain't happy.
Oh they are fine with you, the consumer. You’ve done nothing wrong.
The manufacturers though - they better keep everything zipped up tight or there will be hell to pay if these labels are removed or go missing.
This label is frankly metal and really speaks the truth about 2020 - that there is one set of rules for them and one for us - only it's usually the reverse of this ;)